Quentin Crisp (above) whom Sting immortalised in his song Englishman in Newyork
A few months back while watching a film at Satyam,I saw this guy carrying a handbag, wearing jeans,a girls shirt ,dupetta and glass bangles .Obviously he was gay and I was a little shocked and instinctively repulsed. I kept starring at him in curiosity. Later I realized it’s like treating him like a specimen in a lab and felt guilty about it. A lot of the other people around were staring at him as well and I don’t blame them. We are a conservative city and someone openly admitting without shame that they are gay, which is what this man had done by the way he had dressed, is something that scandalizes us. Whenever I have thought of this incident one thing that strikes me is the tremendous guts it must have taken to come out of the closet about something, which is still considered very unacceptable in our society. There is this song by Sting called Englishman in New York. It is about a gay Brit called Quentin Crisp who in England in the 1930s, which was still under a major Victorian hangover, was a self-confessed homosexual. After being treated as an outcast he moved to New York in the last years of his life, where he was much happier. The plight of gays in India is similar to what it would have been in England in the 1930s.On this reality chat show called Kadaialla Nijam, which used to come on Vijay TV sometime back, this person who was a gay and lesbian rights activist spoke about how there are a substantial number of these people in our city and how they face disapproval and scorn wherever they go. He was talking about how they have to hide what they are, fearing how people may react to them. I think we should all realize that how much ever absurd the idea of same sex couples and attractions might be to us it is something which seems natural to these people. While we have a right to say that we don’t want to have anything to do with them, we have no business passing value judgments on them. We have a right to keep away, but we are nobody to mock, scorn, and ridicule them or call them evil or perverted. The genaralisation that gays try and harass us is being unfair to them. Just like there are men who rape women there may be gay folk who might make a pass at and abuse others. Just like rapists such gays deserve no pity and must be made to pay for their crime. But ostracizing their whole community for this is barbarian.
The situation of the guy I saw at the cinema house is not dissimilar to that of the defiant British gentleman who lived his life without compromise. “It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile, Be yourself no matter what they say.’’-These lines from Sting’s song convey the amazing defiance amdist unthinkable adversity shown by Quentin Crisp, and all people like him who have choosen to live life the way they want to, despite of being thought of as abnormal and wierd . Of course it is not easy for us to accept these people.But lets us respect their way of life and try to be tolerant to them.
13 comments:
Nature has pushed them to that extent.. so, we cannot blame them too much. But at the same time, for wrong doings they hv to be condemned.
I vehemently agree.
It is easy to persecute or berate someone who is "different". This should be a lesson to us about compassion Sidd.
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well written. there are many guys in Inida, but all guys can't live like Quentin Crisp.
Diversity in culture, experience and outlook is one of the most fantastic things about the human race. We don't learn much from people who are the same as us, we learn most from those who are different.
We are all human, regardless of our sex, religion, politics, upbringing, sexual orientation and cultural identity. Once we embrace tolerence then our lives are so much richer for it.
Interesting - I've heard Englishman in New York but I never knew the story behind it. Its good to know that Sting is able to write socially relevant songs !
On a related note, the Beatles' manager Brian Epstein was homosexual and he was always insecure about this because homosexuality was still a crime in England in the 60s. A lot of people think that he was first interested in Beatles because he liked John, but of course, no one knows for sure. There are other sordid stories/rumors about Brian Epstein's secret life :P
I think its still a crime in India though. Although I think it's more a case of sticking to an old british law and not going thru the effort (and more likely, the embarassment) of changing the law.
Gotta accept them too as one among us. It will take time for us to do in our conservative society but it will happen sometime..
I heard about a special caste in India, the Hijra. Can one say they are a kind of traditional transsexual-community? And how are they regarded today?
Nice post...I wish our society wakes up and realizes that its all part of life. We have to respect Gays as well...Its their life ..they can live the way they want to.
I have people at work who dress up normal and we know they are gays and lesbians.!! Life goes on.
As gounder brownie says, maybe u r combining those two siddharth. but anyway they are all sexual deviants. so what.
we all celebrate da vinci and i think even he was one.
Plight of Gays in namba society..
well south of tamil nadu is a place where they would rather have their sons and daughters slaughtered than seeing them in love.
respect and tolerance.... tall order for "culture kalachaaram" guardians..
That's funny when I first heard the song i thought Sting was referring to himself.This reminds me of the words "I'm an alien,I'm an Englishman in New York" now we know what he meant by that!
Very well written and no doubt that's the right attitude towards this issue.. You see so much homophobia nowadays, such biased mind-sets, and its totally baseless because, as you said, homosexuality may seem unnatural to us but normal for them. They might probably feel that the heterosexual relations people share are strange! Anyways live and let live is all there is to it..
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